You Know You're From San Antonio If....

My dad just sent me this!

You know exactly how to get to the Ghost Tracks from anywhere in town. (Er, no. Trish, I think we were near them on the Mission Trail, though.)

You think pro-choice means flour or corn tortillas. (LOL, yes!)

You've never been to the Alamo. (I LOVE going to the Alamo!)

You think a health drink is a margarita without salt. (LOL, yes!)

You think being able to read the Taco Cabana menu makes you bilingual. (LOL, yes!)

You used to live in a neighborhood you wouldn't even drive through now. (LOL, yes!)

There has been a road crew on your street since before the Alamodome was built. (The highways, anyway)

You remember when Crossroads Mall used to be called Wonderland. (Yes)

You've been to Midget Mansion and the Fat Farm. (No)

You know all about the Dancing Diablo and the Donkey Lady bridge. (yes)

You know that Wheatley and Brackenridge is the same school. (no)

You remember the Captain Gus show. (yes)

You have three rodeo outfits but never have been on a horse. (used to)

You are an expert with the brake pedal, but you have no idea what a blinker is. (HA!)

Your idea of culture is wearing a Hard Rock T-shirt. (uhhh, yes.)

You think the last supper was at Mi Tierra. (LOL!)

You think local politicians are crooks, but you still do not vote. (NO!!)

You have a 'Selena Lives' bumper sticker on your car. (No, but I remember clearly the day she died.)

You care if San Antonio is in the national spotlight. (You bet! Number 7, baby!)

A formal occasion is getting a glass with your longneck. (LOL, yes!)

You believe tacos, barbecue, tequila, and beer are the four basic food groups. (They aren't?)

Your white mother learned how to make tamales & menudo from your neighbors. (How about flour tortillas and chicken mole?)

You know the real definition of Fiesta is 'stay home if at all possible.' (NO KIDDING!)

You have ordered Mexican food at a Chinese restaurant. (Yeah, The Maverick Cafe!)

You had breakfast tacos at Taco Cabana on Christmas morning. (It's the only place open, and I don't cook breakfast!)

You remember the Joske's Christmas display. (Yep)

You remember when JC Penney's had a restaurant. (Nope)

You remember hamburgers from Whopper Burger. (Vaguely)

Your elementary school field trip was to the ButterKrust Bakery. (SEVERAL times - and they'd give you a fresh piece of bread at the end. And a pencil.)

You complain about how cold it is when the temperature dips below 70. (Almost - hey, I had goosebumps last week sitting on the patio, and it was in the 60s!)

Your cholesterol is over 300. (LOL, probably!)

You had a birthday party at Kiddie Park. (No, but I went there a lot.)

You have had nightmares about the giant cowboy boots in front of North Star Mall. (LOL)

You own an album by, have seen or are even aware of any of the following bands: 'Moxy', 'Legs Diamond', 'Trapeze', 'Garfield' and especially 'Ozz Knozz' or 'Heyoka.' (Legs Diamond - didn't see them but heard about them all the time on the local radio!)

You know what people are talking about when they refer to the 'hey-she-b.' (H.E.B) (Or the HEEB.)

Your idea of a tropical vacation getaway is Port Aransas. (Or Padre)

You get defensive when your friends from Austin talk about the great show they saw last night. (Uh, yeah. No one comes here.)

You party with your cousin more than twice a week. (LOL, no, my cousins are way younger.)

You call any convenience store 'icehouse.' (Doesn't everyone?)

You have only seen snow once in your life and it was twenty years ago. (Yep. Have pictures.)

You think a flash-flood warning means 'go drive through a low water crossing.' (No kidding!)

You think the exit ramp is your own personal lauch pad. (LOL - yeah!)

You get annoyed when tourists ask for 'fa-jite-as.' (LOL - yeah!)

You could care less about the Rodeo but never miss the Cowboy Breakfast. (I've never been...maybe next year!)

You don't have to look at the menu when you order at Bill Miller. (LOL - yeah!)

You have never, ever called this city 'San Antone.' (True, true!)

2 comments:

Tori Lennox said...

You've never been to the Alamo.

I would think anyone who has out of town visitors has been. :)

You have had nightmares about the giant cowboy boots in front of North Star Mall.

I never had nightmares about them, but I always got a giggle out of seeing them. *g*

You get annoyed when tourists ask for 'fa-jite-as.'

ROFL! Yes!!!

You have never, ever called this city 'San Antone.'

That's like people in San Francisco getting annoyed with people calling it "Frisco". :)

Of course, I never lived in San Antonio. We lived in Austin. But a lot still applies and we went to San Antonio a lot. :)

MaryF said...

You know my pain, Tori!

Austin's pretty awesome, too.

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I'm a mom, a wife, a teacher and a writer. I have five cats and a dog to keep me company. I love bookstores and libraries and Netflix - movies are my greatest weakness.
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